random thought

When I was a kid, I used to say “I want to grow up so that I can easily help everyone!” but now, as a teenager, I can’t even help myself.

Sure, I know that life isn’t about a thing or two. Life is a way more complicated than the word itself; no one knows what might happen, no one knows what might comes.

is it thrilling?  As for some people, yes. But for me, no. A peacefull life is all I ever asked for, but why can’t I have one? Am I not deserve it?

I’m tired. That’s all. I don’t even know what I want to do with myself, I don’t even know what I want to do with my life; because when I thought I already found what I wanted to do, life always gave me a reason to break. Playing with me, my emotion, my mind until I get numb.

At this point, I don’t think I can feel anything..anymore.

I’m tired, too tired. The persons that I love the most; the only thing I could hold on to, in the end, hurts me the most.

It’s not fun. IT SERIOUSLY ISN’T.

I know I might overreacted; someone has a worse life than mine, I know that. I know that I shouldn’t be complain about my life, that I have to be more gratefull and try to enjoy my life while I’m still alive. But it’s hard to breath when it feels like everything tries to break you.

Am I just not good enough? Or am I just too weak to handle my own problems?

I don’t know. Afterall, I’m just a 17 years old human-being.

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